buy backs

at most neighborhood bars, after ordering three rounds and acting like a mensch, the bartender will gift you a round of drinks.

"i've got this one"

practically speaking, a buy back reduces the price of your previous drinks by 33%. but more importantly, everyone likes to feel appreciated. even a bar patron, and even by a bartender.

happy patrons generally translate into well-tipping drunks.
and then everyone wins.

what's beautiful about the buyback is that although it is built into the price of the three drinks purchased prior, it's an unnecessary courtesy.

freebird on the jukebox =no buy back

"gimme a long island iced tea"=no buy back.

prolonged cleavage-instead-of-eye contact =no buy back.

people who demand buy backs =no buy back

buy backs, where they are still given, are a small piece of righteousness in an otherwise unfair world.

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i don't drink the way i used to. accordingly, i have not cultivated relationships with any bartenders in my new neighborhood the way i would have done a year ago. so i don't drink for (relatively) free anymore. and the cycle continues.

but more than getting buy backs, i miss giving them.

i miss giving buy backs to the guy that comes in and is thoughtful enough to ask me how my day is going instead of the douche bag that inquires into my dating status.

i miss giving buy backs to the girl who brings her friend in to get her drunk because she just got dumped, instead of the prissy, demanding brats that inevitably make up every bachelorette party.

i miss giving buy backs to the public school teachers and kids in bands instead of the obnoxious lawyers and condescending hedge fund managers.

in the real world, its the alpha dog sociopaths in power suits that get the raises and the respect. entitled, soulless bitches in pointy shoes get special treatment.

please don't get me wrong. i hardly think that bars and bar culture is ideal. but in this one, tiny, seemingly insignificant, topsy-turvy instance, justice is served. and it's on the house.